Traversing the slush pile

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The insight I have gained reading slush for Allegory has been amazing.   I already have a list of common mistakes from the story submissions I have read.

Here are things you shouldn’t do if you want me to move your story along for further consideration:

1. Telling instead of showing.

Telling:

Sarah liked Michael.

Showing:

Michael was in the hall. Sarah felt the same lightness in her stomach she had the first day he talked to her. If only he would come talk to her now.

Ok, so I am no romance writer, but hopefully you see the difference.  The first one is a report of what is going on. In the second example, we get to experience what she is feeling.

Telling is not inherently bad, unless you are going to write the whole story that way.  The strength of telling lies in its ability to cover a lot of ground quickly.  Showing typically can’t do that.

The strength of showing is the ability to immerse your reader in the world you have created.  It takes a lot more work, but the reader will enjoy the ride so much more.

 

2. Lack of clarity

There are too many stories that try to be cute and whimsical by hiding essential information so they can build suspense or use the lack of information for a surprise reveal.

Guess what? the protagonist is actually a ghost!

It’s even worse when syrupy sweet prose clogs up clarity so bad that sentences become barely understandable.  It takes a long time to get to the point where you can turn out high-brow literary prose (I can’t).  In my opinion, there are very few pros who can do it well. The best bet is to focus on clarity and brevity.  Tell me the story and don’t let your words get in the way.

3. It’s not a story.

There is this whole concept of a story arc that is often omitted. I want a story where there is conflict. This usually (but not always) involves a protagonist and  antagonist.   And in the end, I really love it when the protagonist wins by some method where he has grown in some way, or figured something out, or done something clever that I didn’t expect.   This all may sound a bit formulaic, but it works to keep a story interesting. It doesn’t always have to happen this way, but when the main character gets out of a scrape by just running away, or by defeats evil via sheer luck, I can’t help but feel a bit cheated.  I am also not a big fan of  slice-of-life type stories, unless the character is particularly interesting.  If they are just lying on the bed doing their nails, I am probably going to start fast forwarding until I get to something that piques my interest.  If I don’t see it in a few pages, I am going to click the little “x” to close the document.

4. Unrealistic character actions or dialogue

I usually see this when there is a need for something to happen with a plot point. A character will do something like murder another character for a very weak reason, like “they never liked them.”  If that were true to life, I should go on a gun-toting rampage because I have a whole lot of people I need to take out. I would start at the DMV and work my way through to every shitty waiter who has left me with an empty drink glass through my entire meal. Real life  just doesn’t work that way. Unfortunately.

I am also put off by anything unrealistic for the world the author has set up. If your story takes place 1000 years from now, and people are still using Facebook, you may not have the best grasp on how quickly technology can change.

If you absolutely insist that your character to do something atypical, all you have to do is give a sufficient reason or motivation for them to do so.  A God-fearing Nun won’t shoot someone, unless she is already questioning her beliefs, and her life is in danger.

 

 5. Not beginning at the right place.

I think a lot of pantser writers need a bit of a warm up before they get into a story. Most of the time this warm up can be cut completely without lessening the story.   Here is one of my examples of this:

Searching or creating, that’s all we really want. Even if we don’t know it, it’s what we are working for. We all want enough money for that new car, or new life, enough money to go someplace else, someplace new.

Three million seemed new enough for me, even if they were old bills.

Jen was driving, and I sat in the back. On each side of me were two duffel bags full of cash. There was another bag in the front seat with her, and one more sittin’ between my legs – that one had the guns.

If we were to cut everything before “Jen was driving” nothing critical is lost.

Other times I see stories where I have to go through several unnecessary pages before the plot or conflict becomes clear.  Most of the time these pages can be cut.

6. Not following the submission guidelines.

This is a no-brainer.  If you can’t take the time to read and apply the rules for submission to a publication, how can you expect the publication to take your story seriously?  I won’t penalize a story for improper formatting, or an undesirable font, but I can’t promise you that others won’t, so why even risk it?  My advice is to take the time to properly format one story for submission, then cut and paste other stories into that format for the next time around.

7. The handy plot point.

This occurs when an author needs something to happen, but is so in the middle of the flow of writing that they grab the first thing that comes to mind.  It’s similar to those times we use a steak knife to excitedly cut open a package we have been waiting for, because the knife is right there on the counter and the scissors is all the way inside the junk drawer. For example:

Sarah wasn’t wearing her glasses because she had lost them earlier that day.

If this is the first time in the story that I hear about Sarah’s lost glasses, or her poor eyesight, it will read like this was sloppily tacked on because the author needed a convenient reason.  If authors take the time to think about these seemingly insignificant parts of the story, they can use them to develop their characters much further.  If instead, Sarah choose to not wear her glasses because she thought they made her feel ugly, and we were told this in well in advance of the event that required her to have blurred vision, then it would seem as though the whole thing evolved naturally. It would also tell us how Sarah feels about the way she looks.

The above are just a few from my list of slush reader pet peeves. Please take these with a grain of salt as they may not hold true for other slush readers.

 

– James

 

Blog Tour: #My Writing Process

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I’ve been tagged by the immensely talented and utterly unstoppable Alex Shvartsman, Fiction writer extraordinaire. If it seems like I am kissing up to him, yes, I totally am. I feel I have to. He is the man who took my virginity, so I feel I have to thank him for that.

You should probably also know that I mean this is in a literary, as opposed to, literal sense.

You see, Alex is the first editor to purchase one of my fiction stories. In October, my story The right answer will appear in the UFO 3 Anthology of humorous Science Fiction

Alex is, so far, the only one who has published one of my stories. But like all aspiring writers, I hope to change that.

So what is this “tagging” I speak of? Well, according to Alex’s site, I need to answer some questions about my writing then, in turn, I get to pick two poor souls to do the same.

Here are the questions with my answers:

What am I working on?

I am currently writing a Sci-fi short about a female insurance investigator who goes to check on a suspected fraud claim. Since this is sci-fi, the claim is on a wrecked spacecraft and takes place at a repair station in space. While I enjoy the idea of the story, I find that it is proving to be more difficult than expected.  I usually crank out a short story draft in one sitting, then review it several times to give it some polish. This story, on the other hand, I have to pry out of my head  in constipated out-of-sequence chunks, making me question my process, ability, and general sanity.

 

How does my work differ from others in its genera?

Since I get a lot of rejection letters, I am guessing the answer to this question is that my stories differ because they are much worse than others in the genera. I am hoping to change that through a subtle increase in my work ethic and relentless dogmatic plagiarism.

 

Why do I write what I do?

I write because I like the idea of someone enjoying my stories.  It is also a challenge to myself, because if you have ever tried writing, you know you can bang out what you think is a masterpiece, only to find that nobody likes it– like, mom won’t even put it on the fridge kind of thing.  At first there is this idea that all those idiots you let read it don’t understand your craft, but then, you set it aside for few months, come back to read it to find out that the pacing is terrible, and you are tripping over all these sentences that used to seem buttery smooth, and that you somehow missed the fact that you accidentally changed the name of the main character from “Sven” to “Mike” and back again within the span of two pages.

 

How does my writing process work?

Hmmm… that question seems to assume I have a process.  I kind of liken it to guitar. People come over and see my guitar and they go “Oh, you play guitar?” and I go “I own a guitar, what I do with it cannot yet be called ‘playing’.”

I also own a computer and a word processing program.

 

This is the point in the post where I get to tag two other writers.

I am immediately tempted to tag Ty Drago of Allegory fame.  Ty is another person I am grateful to, as he is the first editor to publish my non-fiction writing.  I would also love to see his responses to these questions, but I know the man is working diligently on a book, so I won’t task him with it.

Instead, I call upon:

The Curious Farmer

and

The Book Mechanic

To follow in our footsteps and Blog their answers to the questions above.

– James

 

 

 

 

Why word count matters when submitting a story

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Word Count for stories

I used to think that putting the word count on a submission wasn’t that big of a deal, as you can look it up in Microsoft Word as soon as you have the document open.

Once I started read slush for an online e-zine, I realized why having the word count was important to Editors; they need to know how much time to set aside to read the story.

Having a word count on the upper part of the first page tells them this right away. If you have it on the cover page (or wherever their submission page asks for it) then you are probably fine.

Exposure!

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Exposure

A blog post from this very site has been picked up by Allegory.  Ironically, Cracking the code, the first piece that I have ever gotten published, is a rant about not getting published.

Thank goodness the editor has a sense of humor.

 

-James

Keeping track of writing submissions

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As soon as I began submitting two stories going at a time, I started losing track of when I had sent them, and to where. I am not sure what other writers do to keep track of submissions, but I made an Excel sheet for the task.

The main tab is a chronological list of the each submission.

Chronological writing submissions

I also have tabs for each of the individual stories to see the chronological history of where they have been submitted.  I see on the tab below that I did submit this story to the same place twice, which is really a no-no, but it was after some editing, a name change to the story and after almost four years had elapsed. Unfortunately, they still didn’t like it.

Writing submissions by story

 

I have another tab  that automatically adjusts so I can tell from a quick glance which stories are available to be submitted. I am not sure if there is actually a “sub-type” category for writing. I just do that for my own reference, because, yes, sometimes I do forget what my own stories are about.

Stories that are able to be submitted

If this is something you feel may be useful, feel free to comment with your e-mail and I will send you the template.

 

-James

VALIDATION!

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Validate

It has happened.

Here are excerpts from a recent series of exciting e-mails:

3/29/2014
“I’m writing to let you know that your story has made it past the initial reading by 3 randomly selected associate editors and is being advanced for further review to a full editorial board.”
4/10/2014

“Your story is one of the top contenders for inclusion into the book”

4/15/2014
“I’d like to officially accept your story for inclusion in UFO3!”

 

And just like that, Little green Fonzie, now called The right answer,  has been accepted for publication in an anthology of humorous science fiction.

Apparently the recipe for getting published is to try really hard for a while, then give up for four years, get married, have a baby, then try again. On the third submission, someone will buy your stuff.

Or it could be that I decided to contact an Editor and hire her to help me clean up my writing.

It may not be hard to guess, but UFO Publishing is one of my favorite online sites now.
-James

Getting Creative

Image

 

It’s not like riding a bike.

The creative juices just don’t flow as easily after you have been away for a while. The hamster wheel has a harder time turning and when it does there is this awful squeaking sound every time it goes around.

I have been going through my old idea pile. I am pleased with what I am finding, yet I am unable to pick up where I left off. It seems I am better at doing a rewrite of something finished, polishing the existing rather than creating anew.  Part of it is that the house now has four people in it instead of just me, but I know in my heart, most of it is of my own lack of volition.

 

Here are some sites with articles I enjoyed on how to get the creative juices flowing:

goinswriter.com

Just creative

how-to-write-a-novel.net

 

 

 

Renewal

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Horse

For some reason I let four years slip by since my last Blog post. In that time all writing and submitting went on hiatus.  How could I let that happen?  Well here are some of the life changers that have been going on since that last post. Please do not construe these as excuses. I have no excuse.

1) I got married

2) I changed jobs

3) We had a baby

The good news is that I am back in the game and have, as of last month, already received two rejection letters.  I am in the process of reconstructing a few of my stories.  The one advantage of being away from your writing for that long is that it gives you a fresh perspective.

I am also excited because a story I submitted to UFO Publishing has advanced past the initial rounds. I received this via e-mail:

Hi James,
I’m writing to let you know that your story has made it past the initial reading by 3 randomly selected associate editors and is being advanced for further review to a full editorial board.
Please expect another e-mail from me in a few days, at which point we will either release the story back to you, or hold it in the “final consideration” pile until I’m ready to make final decisions, sometime in early to mid- April.
Thanks,
Alex

 

Even if it goes no further, it was exciting to know that a few strangers liked it enough to give it a thumbs up and move it up the ladder.

Now that I am getting back on the horse, my time away has also reminded of Mark Twain, who, at one point, put down The adventures of Huckleberry Finn and didn’t return to it until seven years later.  Please note that this “fact” is a faint recollection of something my 9th grade English teacher told us.  I am certain of the author, but hazy as to whether I have the right book. I also couldn’t find any reference to this lapse in writing anywhere online.

Back in high school seven years seemed like an eternity. It was forever to walk away and then come back to a story.  I now understand how easily that can happen. I have a batch of stories that I wrote back in 1991 on an apple II. They are complete crap. I get a real bittersweet visceral sensation when reading those. I enjoy seeing how creative I could be at times, but I am frightened by the naivety and illiteracy that twenty year old had at the time.

At least I am not as naive anymore.

 

 

 

Getting a bead on Stanley Schmidt

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Getting a bead on Stan.

Stanley is the Editor of Analog Magazine.

As you may or may not know, I have been reading some of Stanley Schmidt’s work in order to get a feel for what he might like in a Sci-Fi story.   My theory is that all things being equal, learning about the man’s interest and style of writing could help me to tailor my stories toward something he has an interest in.

The biggest thing I have learned about Stanley is that he is really just looking for a good story.  My assumption is that there are a lot of those, so I need to hedge my chances by writing in a style and maybe even including content that will catch his fancy.

Here is what I have learned so far:

1) Stanley like music. He includes it as a trait of the Kyyra (Alien race) it in his book “The Sins of the Fathers”. Reading online about Stanley and Analog showed me that Analog magazine employees have also formed an informal band.

2) Stan loves to end a chapter with a hook or cliffhanger for the next chapter.

3) He does a lot of telling in his writing.  I am basing this on “The Sins of the fathers” which was written in 1975, so his writing style may have changed a bit since then.  But it’s good to know that he probably doesn’t consider telling ( as opposed to showing) as much of a mortal sin as some fiction aficionados do.

I had recently read Issac Asimov’s “Foundation” prior to reading Stan’s book. It could just be the temporal proximity of the two rattling around in my brain, but it seems that Stan’s writing style is very similar to Asimov. It made me think that  Asimov may be a mentor of sorts for him. There is also mention of a “Foundation “ in ‘Sins of the fathers” which seemed an awful lot like Stanley’s way of tipping his hat to Asimov.

4) Stanley has a degree of inefficiency in his writing. I think we all do, but the one sentence I really keyed off of was when he used a phrase that was something to the effect of  “He changed the subject”, then went on to show the changing of subject in the dialogue.  If you show the action happening, you really don’t need to tell about it beforehand.

What I gathered from this is that Stanley should be pretty forgiving if I inadvertently do something like that.

I am sure there is a lot more to learn about this man, but I am probably better off just working on perfecting the stories I have to tell, and not worrying so much about tailoring my stories to please one editor.

James

Two more rejections

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I have received two more rejections since the last post.

One was for my story “The closet”, which is about a mysterious black void that changes things for both better and worse after they are placed inside it. The rejection came from Science Fiction and Fantasy Magazine Editor Gordon Van Gelder who wrote:

“Many thanks for Submitting “The Closet,” but I’m going to pass on this one. I’m afraid this Twilight Zone-ish story didn’t quite grab me, alas. Thanks anyway for sending it my way and best luck to you with this one.”

At first glance the rejection seems soft and nice, but after getting a few of these you can read between the lines.  Let’s break it down:

“Many thanks for Submitting “The Closet,” but I’m going to pass on this one”

First off, I never realized that you put the comma within the quotes, before the conjunction on a sentence like that.  I assume he is correct in doing this, the man is an editor after all, so I am going to tuck that grammar tip away for later.

I also like his fun, loose tone in the rejection letter. There is no “Dear sir” from this guy just a “Many thanks,” like he’s wearing sandals and chewing on a beef jerky while responding.

Breaking it down to what this sentence really means, I get:

“I am not going to buy your story”

He then goes on to say:

“I’m afraid this Twilight Zone-ish story didn’t quite grab me, alas.”

Translation:

“You ripped off of the Twilight Zone. It was obvious, and I didn’t like it.”

He did use the word “alas”, and when I read that I first pictured him in a regretful whimsical sigh, but then I realized I am not even sure what “alas” means.  I always kind of thought it was like the conjunction “but”, except Gordon used it at the end of a sentence, so I looked it up by typing  “Define: alas” into my favorite search engine.

This is what Google had to say:

Alas: Unfortunately: by bad luck; “unfortunately it rained all day”; “alas, I cannot stay”

So the full sentence really translates to:

“You ripped off of the Twilight Zone.  It was obvious, and unfortunately I didn’t like it.”

Editor Gordon then ends with:

“Thanks anyway for sending it my way and best luck to you with this one.”

Translation:

“Please don’t send this to me again, or anything like it.”

I also stumbled on  “best luck” as I have always heard that phrased as “best of luck”.  I wonder if Gordon missed a word or if that’s actually the proper way we should be using the phrase.  Maybe the addition of the word “of” is just an idiom we all picked up over time?

I consider if I should start saying ‘Best luck” from here on out and think:  What am I the Queen of England?  What do I care if I’m not proper?

I decide that I am still going to use it my way, with “of” tucked neatly in between “best” and “luck”.

To drop the “of” would be like calling this guy “Gordon Gelder.” I am pretty sure “van” translates to “of”, and that his last name, Van Gelder, at one time literally meant “of Gelder” or “of Gold” or something like that.

I find a certain degree of pleasurable irony in all that.

Translating the whole thing we get:

“I am not going to buy your story. You ripped off of the Twilight Zone; it was obvious, and unfortunately, I didn’t like it.  Please don’t send this to me again, or anything like it”

I would love to get a note so full of refreshing candor like that, but Editors have to maintain all this tact so as not to drive the other unqualified, and much less stable, writers into a gun toting rage.

The second rejection came from Ty Drago, Editor of Allegory E-zine.

OK, is it just me, or is “Ty Drago” the absolutely coolest name ever?  I mean that name could pass for either a superhero or a super villain. The Ty part makes him sound warm and friendly, like that guy on the home makeover show, and “Drago” just sounds like, if you did some genealogy research, you may be able to trace his bloodline right back to Satan.

This is what Mr. Coolest-name-ever wrote:

“Thanks for letting us ‘Things Remembered.” I regret to say that it’s just not right for Allegory.

 

Here’s what our editor had to say:

>

> What I liked: The imaginative plot

>

> Reason for rejection:   Could benefit from some editing. Punctuation

> errors (dialogue tags, lack of commas); spelling errors, repetitive

> use of the word ‘it’ and ‘that’.  Small stuff, but distracting.

>

 

I’m sorry. Best of luck with this one in other markets.

 

– Ty Drago

– Editor

– Allegory

Clearly this was submitted before I boned up on grammar.  Or at least did some boning. Er…  you know what I mean.

Let’s still break it down and see what Ty really meant:

“Thanks for letting us “Things Remembered.” I regret to say that it’s just not right for Allegory.”

Once again I stumbled while reading, this time it was on the disconnect between  “us” and “’Things Remembered’”.  It looks like I am supposed to infer the word “see” in between, but I am guessing it’s just an oversight/typo on his part.

It’s also kind of a slap in the face when they go on to rip about my grammar problems.

Translation:

“I am not going to buy your story”

Next line:

“Here’s what our editor had to say”

 

What? I thought your title was Editor?  Wait, are you are a slush pile reader, or a maybe just a guy who knows how to run the e-mail a lot better than the editor?  Because I can see the “>” symbols showing me that the editor forwarded an e-mail back to you…. I guess, a filter is probably the best term for you.

But I then realize that may also mean my story made it through one reader, and onto the big chief, before getting the final rejection. That seems kind of cool.

And then I get all “conspiracy theory” and wonder if Ty Drago didn’t just add the >’s himself.

It would work so well; making it look like my story made it’s way through to the editor, and was seriously considered. Plus there is the whole “power of the third party” thing where I can’t really get mad at Drago for things the editor had commented about, and apparently there is no name to this higher up editor, so there is no way for me to go ballistic on him/her.

I then think that maybe Ty is the Editor and someone else runs the e-mail on his behalf, using his name.

I decide that’s what I am going to believe.  It’s probably healthier than conspiracy.

I continue to read between the lines.

“> What I liked: The imaginative plot”

 

At first glance, this comment makes me feel really good about my story. Like there is some hope since I at least have an imaginative plot.  But then I realize if you were going to pick one thing that could generically apply to, and flatter, all writers, commenting about how creative the plot is, would be that thing.

No writer who submits a story thinks “I hope my rip off of Star Wars goes over well.”   Everyone thinks that they have some unique and original twist in their own story.  Even though there is a whole Joseph Campbell-ish mindset out there that there is really only one story and all other stories are spin offs.

Translation:

“There was nothing positive about this story.”

Next lines:

> Reason for rejection:   Could benefit from some editing. Punctuation

> errors (dialogue tags, lack of commas); spelling errors, repetitive

> use of the word ‘it’ and ‘that’.  Small stuff, but distracting.

Jeez, slow down on using three lines to reject it. I get it already – I are bad at grammar.

Although I was surprised on the “it” and “that” comment.  I didn’t realize I had such a problem with it/that.

Translation:

“You fail to grasp English. ”

Next Line:

I’m sorry. Best of luck with this one in other markets.

 

(~See~ this guy said “Best of luck”)

Mr. Best-name-ever actually spelled out “other” markets to me.  So not only does he not want to see this story again, but maybe I should also try to hit the minor leagues with it and the rest of whatever I have to offer him.

Translation:

“I’m laughing at you. Don’t send anything to me again. You are way in over your head.“

When we put it all together this is what Ty really had to say:

“I am not going to buy your story. There was nothing positive about this story.  You fail to grasp English. I’m laughing at you. Don’t send anything to me again. You are way in over your head.”

It seems harsh, but I think, pretty accurate.  It’s just too bad that editors don’t feel like they are able to write that candidly.

And don’t think for a minute any of this has gotten me down.  I just need to polish up another batch of my crap and send it off to annoy yet another league of editors.

James